i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
