No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
