i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I have so many feelings about this burrito
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize