i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize
