Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize