im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
