the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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