Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
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