I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
