Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
