physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
two words: eviction party
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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