it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
