I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
