I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
