just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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