You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize