I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
i think i just lost a toe
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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