We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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