Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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