Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize