with your own penis?
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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