this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I skipped work to stalk him.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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