You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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