did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
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