i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It's blow job season.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
COCAINE IS GR8
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
