nut hugger
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize