I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
