If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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