Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Randomize
