How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
