...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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