You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
