never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
