So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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