Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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