Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
