I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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