i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I need mimosas to revive my soul
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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