Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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