thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
