I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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