I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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