She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
