Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize