we're blogging at a bar
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize