RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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