guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
