return my video game
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Randomize
