Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
