I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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