i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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